Joe Black: Careful Bill, you'll give yourself a heart attack and ruin my vacation.
William Parrish: Don't blow smoke up my ass, it will ruin my autopsy.
Drew: And who would've thought... you, an IRS agent.
Joe Black: Death and Taxes.
William Parrish: When I introduce you, and I tell them who you are, I don't think anyone will stay for dinner.
William Parrish: You want me to be your guide?
Joe Black: You fit the bill, Bill.
Allison: I should have my head examined again.
Drew: We all know this deal is as certain as death and taxes.
Joe Black: Death and taxes?
Drew: Yes.
Joe Black: *Death* and taxes?
Drew: Yes.
Joe Black: What an odd pairing.
William Parrish: Love is passion, obsession, someone you can't live without. If you don't start with that, what are you going to end up with? Fall head over heels. I say find someone you can love like crazy and who'll love you the same way back. And how do you find him? Forget your head and listen to your heart. I'm not hearing any heart. Run the risk, if you get hurt, you'll come back. Because, the truth is there is no sense living your life without this. To make the journey and not fall deeply in love - well, you haven't lived a life at all. You have to try. Because if you haven't tried, you haven't lived.
Susan Parrish: Love, passion, obsession, all those things you told me to wait for, well, they've arrived. What are you afraid of, Dad? That I'll fall head over heels for Joe? Well, I have.
William Parrish: I thought I was going to sneak away tonight. What a glorious night! Every face I see is a memory. It may not be a perfectly... perfect memory. Sometimes we've had our ups and downs, but we're all together, And you're mine, for a night. And I'm going to break precedence and tell you my one candle wish: that you would have a life, as lucky as mine where you can wake up one morning and say, "I don't want anything more." 65 years, don't they go by in a blink?
Susan Parrish: Tell me you love me now.
Joe Black: I love you now. I love you always.
Joe Black: Thank you for loving me.
Joe Black: I can't believe you people. I come for you, and you want to stay, I let you stay and you want to go.
William Parrish: Do you know about money?
Joe Black: It can't buy happiness?
Joe Black: I don't care Bill. I love her.
William Parrish: How perfect for you - to take whatever you want because it pleases you. That's not love.
Joe Black: Then what is it?
William Parrish: Some aimless infatuation which, for the moment, you feel like indulging - it's missing everything that matters.
Joe Black: Which is what?
William Parrish: Trust, responsibility, taking the weight for your choices and feelings, and spending the rest of your life living up to them. And above all, not hurting the object of your love.
Joe Black: So that's what love is according to William Parrish?
William Parrish: Multiply it by infinity, and take it to the depth of forever, and you will still have barely a glimpse of what I'm talking about.
Joe Black: Those were my words.
William Parrish: They're mine now.
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